Jim Rohn is often quoted as saying: You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. If this is true, would that be good news or bad news for you?
I don’t know if this statement is true, but I will agree that the people we surround ourselves with have a big influence on our lives. If you surround yourself with those who are frustrated, dissatisfied, fearful, worried all the time, complainers, and people pleasers then they bring those aspects out in you because that’s what they want to talk about. You commiserate with them. They trigger the areas in your own life where you are frustrated, dissatisfied, or fearful. You get to be on the same wavelength together.
But do you want to stay there? Probably not.
Maybe you’re ready to start thriving. Maybe you’re ready to crush your excuses and begin to design a life of purpose and meaning. Maybe you want to find more supportive people but don’t know how or where to find them. Maybe you need some help to get unstuck from your stories.
I can see a huge difference in the quality of my life between a couple of years ago and now since I made a shift in those I surround myself with. I speak about that in the video.
I have a couple of opportunities coming up and I hope you’ll join me in one (or more) of them.
When you get clear on how you want to show up in the world; when you get clear on how you are going to use your talents, skills, gifts, and passion to make a difference; when you get clear on what you want to experience and what you will no longer settle for - the result is increased confidence and power.
Instead of apologizing for your big dreams, embrace them. Clarity is an important step and activates opportunities.
No more being 'wishy washy' - get crystal clear and expect opportunity to come knocking.
It can be exhausting pushing all the time. We push ahead toward our goals and toward manifesting our desires. We focus, get down to business, and get 'er done. However, this type of push energy isn't sustainable and then when we get tired of pushing, we might feel guilt or shame becasue we think we're failures.
The balance to 'push energy' is 'pull energy' and both are needed for this journey called life. Pull energy allows us to tune in and deterime our next inspired step. Pull energy allows for the twists and turns and ups and downs of our journey, knowing we are headed in the right direction. 'Pull energy' is not necessarily easy and effortless, but it is flowing.
Push energy can give you some traction, it can help get you started, and you can sustain what you start with Pull Energy.
How can you use both Push Energy and Pull Energy to move forward in the direction of your dreams?
Henry David Thoreau wrote, “It’s not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?
Are we so busy that we don’t pay attention to our life? Is our busy-ness an excuse not to move forward in the direction of our goals, dreams, visions, or desires?
What if busy-ness was masking other traits like inertia, weakness, or fear? What if we are making ourselves busy so we don’t have to plan, strategize, commit, be disciplined, and so it seems like we have a legitimate way to stay in our comfort zone.
After all, we don’t have time to peek into our possibility zone when we are busy with the urgent matters that take up all of our day-to-day lives.
What if our busy-ness is just a cover-up?
Time to ‘get naked’ and explore what your badass self looks like. Methinks it looks pretty darn good.
When I was young I wanted to be an actress. That desire was put away (I thought forever) until a colleague and mentor reminded me last week that although I am not an actress, I spent the past 10 years on a stage, getting applause, gaining recognition, and impacting lives as a minister. She asked, “Isn’t that the same essence and energy of what you wanted when you were a little girl?”
Wow! I never made that connection.
So, even though our early desires (those that haven’t been filtered out by what we ‘should’ be doing) may have been buried long ago, I’m inviting you to bring them back up to the surface and see if you can re-engage, re-energize, and re-connect with them.
Let’s make 2018 the year to unleash our bold, beautiful, brilliant, and badass self!
I love my ‘To Do” List. Those delightful check boxes call my name. Yeah, it might be a false sense of actually accomplishing something, but I love them anyway.
And I am beginning a new love affair with a different sort of list - my "Not-To-Do" List, or more accurately, my “To Stop” List. You know, those habits and patterns that keep me stuck and safe. Like stop saying ‘yes’ when I want to say ‘no.’ Stop putting everyone else first. Stop thinking I have to be perfect.
Watch this video to find out what else is on my list. And I’d love to know what you’d put on your "To Stop" list.
Please let me know below by commenting.
I don't know what's up with my left eyelid, and it's horribly distracting. If you can get beyond that, here's the gist of the video:
Our self-limiting beliefs are keeping us from creating the life of our dreams, which is the land of human fulfillment.
Our limiting beliefs tell us we can't change, that it is too late, that we don't have what it takes, that we've missed our opportunity, and that we aren't up for the task.
But we do have what it takes to change. Everything we need is within and it is here and now. We just need to crack open the door (or window) to new possibilities and let the breeze rush in to blow away the fear and doubt.
We have what it takes to live our purpose, our passion, and share our talents in a way that makes an impact.
Nothing we want is inside our comfort zone (don't you hate that??!!) and going outside our comfort zone doesn't give us the 'warm and fuzzies' and so we resist. But we still want our dreams, our goals, our passion, more money, greater health, greater self-esteem (you name it).
Instead of going outside of our comfort zone, we love to use affirmations that state "my [insert desire here] is coming to me easily and effortlessly" - but if that 'good' is outside our comfort zone, moving closer to it is neither easy or effortless. (Do you see the paradox here?)
I talk about this in my video below and in this article.
Trust me, I've been there and done that. I've turned away from moving forward because things became challenging. It wasn't easy. Silly me.
Sometimes we need to poke fun at ourselves. If everything was easy, we'd all be sipping Pina Coladas on our own private beach.
Moving outside our comfort zone means change and growth. It means we'll most likely encounter resistance and obstacles.
We have a choice to call it quits and think the Universe is giving us a message or we can persist in moving forward and moving through discomfort.
As Brendan Burchard said, "You know humanity only has two recurring characters in its narrative and that's struggle and progress. And a lot of us don't want the struggle."
I loved making this video for you this week. I hope you enjoy it.
Someone told me this week that they look forward to seeing where (in my house) I’m going to film my video. I look forward to figuring it out, too.
I want to do some filming outdoors to show the beauty of Sedona, but we are in the midst of monsoon season and it was really humid today. Soon.
In this video, I dive deeper into what I mean about setting an authentic ‘big why.’
So many of my ‘spiritually-minded’ friends and clients want to steer clear of the lower vibrational needs, wants, and desires of their human selves. Instead, they want to affirm only high vibration love and light. I get it.
But I believe we are here to blend – to marry – the human with the spiritual. I believe we are meant to be deeply human and yet know we are more than we think we are.
To me, it isn’t about denying our humanness, but embracing it.
And so our authentic ‘big why’ might have more to do with our human longing than our spiritual perfection.
I give two examples in this video.
Let me know what you think.
We all know that our 'Big Why' is supposed to help us stay motivated on our way to our goals. But what if we are confusing our Big Why with our ultimate purpose? It might sound good, but may not be enough to keep us motivated or keep up our momentum.
Sometimes if our Big Why sounds 'needy' (I want to be famous, I want applause and recognition, I want to prove to 'so-and-so' that I can do this thing) we may ignore that reason and grab onto something that sounds more enlightened or inspired.
It's time to start where we are and claim our authentic Big Why. It will change as we grow and expand, but we have to start with what will get us moving in the direction of our dreams now.
I'll dive more into this on my next video.
Janet works with women who struggle with putting everyone else first, settling, playing small, and not following their dreams. She helps them move beyond the negative voices in their head so they can unleash their purpose, unmask their brilliance, and uncover possibilities that they have been blind to.