“I gave myself permission to feel and experience all of my emotions. In order to do that, I had to stop being afraid to feel. In order to do that, I taught myself to believe that no matter what I felt or what happened when I felt it, I would be okay.” ~ Iyanla Vanzant
Okay, I just posted a video called “Clarity is Power” and now I’m posting a blog called “Permission is Power.” So which is it? What’s more powerful, clarity or permission? And what does permission have to do with power? I’m glad you asked.
We get hung up on clarity.
I speak to many women who think that once they have this magical, mystical thing called ‘clarity’ then they’ll know their purpose, they’ll be happy, they’ll be able to move forward, and they’ll have confidence. But I think that we (especially women) use this lack of clarity as our excuse to stay stuck, to treat our purpose and our passion as a hobby, or to put off being bold or outrageous.
Now, don’t get me wrong. Clarity is a powerful motivator and accelerator. With clarity we have a sense of direction and vision. Our affirmations, visualizations, and meditations can be specific and juicy. Clarity is our guide and compass.
But what if we are afraid? Afraid to shine, afraid to stand out, afraid to lead, afraid to soar?
Sometimes we have blocks to our own brilliance and magnificence and then clarity eludes us. But if we say we want clarity, then it looks like we are blocked only because we don’t know where we should be going. Not because we are afraid to move or make a decision.
This is where permission comes in.
Let me ask you a question (or two or three). Are you feeling stuck? Do you feel frustrated or trapped? Are you embarrassed or even ashamed that you aren’t more successful or that you haven’t achieved more?
What you may need is permission for your desire.
"We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us."
Autumn is here!
For many people this is their favorite time of year. The warm days of summer begin to cool and the landscape turns gorgeous shades of orange and red. Admittedly, we don’t get much color change here in Sedona, so when I get to see an Aspen turning yellow or come across other fall colors, it makes it all the more sweet!
For me, autumn brings other things to mind as well. As the seasons change in seemingly dramatic ways, I like to reflect on my own changing seasons and the fall is a great time to do that.
Think of it this way: The trees are shedding what no longer serves them. They are letting go to make room for new growth in a few months. They don’t hang on ‘just in case’ they’ll need one or two of those leaves for something. They are shaking loose and setting themselves free (so to speak).
In the Jewish tradition, this is the time for Yom Kippur (Sept. 19 this year), Day of Atonement – and in New Thought/metaphysics we like to think of atonement as At-One-Ment. It’s hard to be ‘at one’ with the Divine when we are overloaded with limiting beliefs, holding onto grudges, or carrying shame. It’s hard to step into our full awesomeness and badass self when we are hiding out and playing it safe.
I’m ready to clear some stagnant energy. I’m ready to let go of the heaviness of judgement (of self and others). I’m ready to let go of those excuses that are music to my ears but death to my soaring dreams. I’m ready to recognize the ways I’ve missed the mark this year.
And on the other side of ‘letting go’ is embracing some new ideas and behaviors.
Are you ready, too?
Janet Kingsley is an effective 'Belief Change Expert' who helps clients transform frustration to focus, confusion to clarity, and self-doubt to self-confidence.