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When Yes Means No

3/30/2017

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If we are paying attention to our lives, we'll recognize those defining moments.
The challenge for so many of us is that we are so deep into daily distractions
and 'being busy, busy' that we miss out on those moments and opportunities that - if jumped on - would get our careers and personal lives to a whole new level of wow. 
~ Robin S. Sharma

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Everyone is busy.

But are we busy doing things that matter? Are we busy doing things that are in pursuit of our passion and purpose or are we so over-committed that we hardly take a breath? 

There's an old saying that 'if you want something done, give it to a busy person.' I'm one of those busy people and I manage to meet my many commitments in my various roles of full-time employee, coach, and minister. And each of these roles carries a big 'to-do' list. And of course, I also want to have some fun, go dancing, listen to music and enjoy the Sedona sunshine.
 
Saying 'yes' to these things means I have to say 'no' to something else!

It seems that I like to say 'yes' (or maybe I'm just not very good at saying 'no.') But for every 'yes' I say, I am saying 'no' to something else. When I say 'yes' to playing Bingo on Sunday, then I'm saying 'no' to my weekly grocery shopping that I like to do on Sundays - and that means I'll have to do it some time during the week. 
 
If I say 'yes' to a movie with a friend then I'm saying 'no' to the time I wanted to spend on my business. For me, I need to become more conscious about what I am saying 'yes' to. 

I write frequently about saying 'yes' to our dreams. And if we do say 'yes' to our dreams, then we need to say 'no' to the demands on our time that do not move us in the right direction.
 
Recently I said 'yes' to two more coaching programs and am thinking of enrolling in a third high-end program. So now I have to figure out what I need to say 'no' to in order to have enough time to dedicate to these programs. It's a tough decision. People depend on me. And I do need to sleep occasionally.

What about you? Do you run from meeting to meeting or appointment to appointment? Are you so busy that you don't have time to prepare healthy meals and end up eating out all the time? Do you feel overworked and undervalued? Do you feel like a slave to your schedule and look forward to those moments when you can just chill out and relax?

Maybe are saying 'yes' to everyone else and that means you are actually saying 'no' to yourself.

It's time to reclaim your power and put yourself, your vision, your health, your family, your dreams, and your purpose FIRST. It might be challenging because it's new behavior for us. It might mean we need to set (and keep) healthy boundaries. It might mean other people react by becoming upset because we don't drop everything like we used to.

Let's get clear on what we say 'yes' to and make sure we mean it!


Maybe it's time for some clarity and reflection. Maybe it's time to really decide what's important and valuable in your life. Maybe I can help you with that as well. Click here for a Breakthrough Session.


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Call to Action: In the next 24 - 48 hours
  • Think about times during the past 30 days that you said 'yes' to someone else when you just didn't  want to be rude or disappoint them. By saying 'yes' to them, write down what you were actually saying 'no' to
  • If you had said 'no,' what might have been a possible outcome? What would have been saying  'yes' to instead?
  • For the next  week, instead of answering any requests for your time with an automatic 'yes,' ask for some time to check your calendar, and make a conscious choice. Write down what you will be saying 'no' to by saying 'yes' to the request.

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    About Janet

    Janet Kingsley is an effective 'Belief Change Expert' who helps clients transform frustration to focus, confusion to clarity, and self-doubt to self-confidence.

    If you are ready to overcome self-sabotage and reclaim your badass mojo, Janet can help you get the rapid results you are looking for.

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Mindset Strategist and Trailblazer, Janet Kingsley, works with women who are ready to crush their excuses so they can design an authentic and meaningful life - - because most are settling, people-pleasing, and feel like a fraud. She helps them amplify their impact, boost their self-confidence, and connect to their purpose in a fun and inspiring way…every time!
 
Bottom Line: they powerfully create a joyful, juicy life that reflects the deepest part of who they are and why they are here while igniting their unique brilliance and passion. In other words, they are on purpose and on fire.

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  • Home
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