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When Being Realistic Holds You Back

2/28/2020

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f you want to be certain that you’ll never face a challenge or find yourself in a difficult or challenging situation, then it’s really important to have tame and realistic goals and dreams. Goals and dreams that you know you can achieve with minimal effort and hardship. Safe dreams. Comfortable goals.

However, if you want to have any degree of excitement and experience real growth in your life, then you’re going to have to make plans and set goals that other people might label as unrealistic.

These kind of goals often come with a high degree of risk (as well as sexiness and satisfaction – and who doesn’t want that, right?) You rarely know how you are going to achieve them until you get started. And more often than not, the result you achieve will not be exactly what you set out to do in the first place.
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Chances are, the people you admire the most had some outlandish dreams and set some unrealistic goals. And they had the courage to take those first steps, keep the vision, and persevere despite challenges and set-backs. 


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This Belief Might be Holding You Back

2/6/2020

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​Many of us have a deep belief (not shared with others, of course) that we are not good enough or not deserving of love or that something’s wrong with us. We may ‘consciously’ know it isn’t true, but sometimes (dare I say often?) we’ll get triggered and then that hidden belief ends up running the show and then we act as if it were true.
 
What does an “I’m not good enough” behavior look like when you get triggered? Well…..
  • You don’t speak up when you’re treated badly
  • You think you have to earn respect by being  nice
  • You feel taken for granted
  • You say ‘yes’ when you want to say ‘no’
  • ‘People-pleaser’ is your middle name
  • You feel guilty if other people aren’t happy
  • You make sacrifices for others at your own expense
  • You agree with people even when you disagree with them because you don’t want to ‘rock the boat’
 
Do any of the above behaviors indicate a healthy self-esteem? Not in my book. And I’ve done all of the above. Many times. My entire life. And I lost myself (my bold, brilliant, and brazen self!)
 
I lost my authenticity. I lost my vulnerability. I lost my courageousness. I lost my passion. I lost my purpose. I lost my dreams. I was living for others and when I bothered to tune into me, I felt destitute and bereft and disheartened. And these were feelings I surely didn’t want to face. They were more painful than the feelings I was already experiencing. 


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    About Janet

    Janet Kingsley is an effective 'Belief Change Expert' who helps clients transform frustration to focus, confusion to clarity, and self-doubt to self-confidence.

    If you are ready to overcome self-sabotage and reclaim your badass mojo, Janet can help you get the rapid results you are looking for.

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Mindset Strategist and Trailblazer, Janet Kingsley, works with women who are ready to crush their excuses so they can design an authentic and meaningful life - - because most are settling, people-pleasing, and feel like a fraud. She helps them amplify their impact, boost their self-confidence, and connect to their purpose in a fun and inspiring way…every time!
 
Bottom Line: they powerfully create a joyful, juicy life that reflects the deepest part of who they are and why they are here while igniting their unique brilliance and passion. In other words, they are on purpose and on fire.

Would you like to know more? Let’s set up a time for a quick ‘get acquainted’ call. 

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  • Home
  • Meet Janet
    • My Ideal Client
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  • Services
    • Free Get Acquainted Call
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    • Mustang Sallies
    • Email Coaching
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